Ridiculous.

I know that this probably isn't fair of me,
and that i'm probably being really cruel...
but honestly
i'm getting really irritated with you.

Like... honest to god,
i am starting to get irritated.

I don't know why either.

It's just...
stop feeling sorry for yourself.

Maybe it's just who i am and how see things,
but when i was in your place, i picked myself up off the ground and told myself to put one foot ahead of the other.

And i got past that hill.

But you're not doing that.
You're just standing still waiting for someone to come push you along.
you can't rely on people in this world.
It's a free for all.
it's either you do it for yourself, or you get left behind.

You're progressively getting worse and worse,
and you always talk about it
But you never fucking do anything about it.
You say you want to get better...
but i'm starting to think that's a lie.

This is YOUR life.
You are in charge of your life.
If you can't change things that ARE possible to change,
then you're just not trying hard enough.
You're subconsciously hoping that someone will notice you and come help you.

I don't want to be the one to say this, but since no one else is telling you, i guess i have to:
No one will help pick you up.
It's not that they don't want to,
but in the end
it all boils down to yourself.
We can help you along by showing you the right way
but if you're not willing to put in the effort to change
then we can't do anything more.

I know problems like these aren't easily solved,
they don't go away overnight.
I know.
I've been there.
But if you don't start, you're never going to finish.
So instead of spending time wallowing in self pity and waiting and wanting someone to care,
do it yourself.
You are strong enough.
Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
Life isn't fair.
Time won't stand still for you.
You've already lost so much time,
so it's about time you picked up the pace.

Baby steps.
Don't do it all at once, because it's overwhelming.
There are still some days where i fall back into my old habits
and where my thoughts are so negative sometimes, it's a wonder that i haven't completely lashed out yet.
But i get over it,
because i tell myself:
Tomorrow will be better.
And if tomorrow isn't better?
well, then i guess yesterday wasn't so bad.
Time will keep going regardless of what happens.
That's what keeps me going.
Because i know time won't stop flowing
and no matter how much i don't want it to come,
the sun will rise again.
So instead of spending all your energy on negative emotions
accept it.
Feel bad for a bit,
then stand up and let everything fall away behind you
and take that step forward.




That's all i have to say to you.
I don't know how else to help you.
Because i honestly can't.
I'm not good with this kind of stuff,
i don't talk to people about these things.
But i can write it down, and hope that you see it.
Only you can help yourself.
If this hasn't motivated you to do something,
then i don't know what will.

Don't say 'i can't'
Don't say 'it's too hard'
Don't say 'i don't know how'

Tell yourself 'i can.'
Tell yourself 'If it's too hard now, then i have to try harder'
Tell yourself 'i will figure it out'



No one likes seeing a friend in depression.
But only you can get yourself out of that hole,
because you were the one who allowed yourself to dig it in the first place.

You control your own happiness.

So isn't it about time you reined it in?